How I've been building self confidence
We can Become Better as an Ummah, Here’s How
One of the most beautiful things the account showed me is how Islam transcends everything: wherever you are in the world, whatever your ethnicity is, as long as you truly love your deen and understand it, you’ll always connect with people and see them as your brothers and sisters.
I’m a firm believer that as much as we will indeed be alone on the Day of Judgement, we should make a conscious effort to come together and strengthen our Ummah. Here are 3 ways to do so:
1. Stop judging or assuming
“See this girl? She slept with a guy who isn’t her husband and calls herself muslim…”, “That person is a fake muslim”… A few examples of things we should not be saying and that are highly condemned in Islam. Backbiting and gossiping are truly diseases of the heart and while we have normalized these practises, it is essential to avoid doing it at all cost.
Keep in mind that we all sin, do not disregard a person based on actions of the lack of it, especially considering we might not know the good deeds they do and don’t show, the guilt they feel, and whether they repented or not.
Likewise, you need to be careful with assuming imams, hijabis, and other people who seem close to their deen are irreproachable: you might take inspiration from them, but do not assume they’re perfect because only our Creator is and it will add pressure on them when they might also struggle with their deen.
"O you who have believed, avoid much [negative] assumption. Indeed, some assumption is sin. And do not spy or backbite each other. Would one of you like to eat the flesh of his brother when dead? You would detest it. And fear Allah; indeed, Allah is Accepting of repentance and Merciful." [49:12]
2. Learn and make kind reminders
When someone exposes a sin, it is your duty as a Muslim to remind them what Allah (swt) expects from us if you are aware of it. However, there is a proper way to do it, which does not involve anger, contempt or guilt, as you should not expect them to obey you.
Be careful with the words you use and make sure to either quote the Quran or what our Prophet (saws) said/would have done. If the person takes it badly anyway or starts to point at your sins and how you shouldn’t be giving lessons, tell them you’re open to improvement and learning too, and that it is up to them to accept the advice or not. Again, we were created as failing creatures, we all sin – but it doesn’t mean we aren’t aware of the Right Path and able to remind the people we care about.
Being kind and caring towards each other as well as making sure we educate ourselves and others is key to be better muslims.
"The Prophet (saws) said: The believer is the believer's mirror, and the believer is the believer's brother who guards him against loss and protects him when he is absent." Abu Dawud
3. Support and make duas
If you see or hear about a Muslim being in need, feeling lost or lonely, offer your help, advice or at least make a du’a for them.
It is in these moments that one may lose sight of what Islam is about and stop trusting Allah (swt). Knowing that you are not alone, that others have been through similar hardships and motivating each other to learn more will ultimately lead you to grow closer to your deen, constantly wanting to improve and rebuild the Ummah our beloved Prophet (saws) expected from us!
We might sometimes be disappointed by the behavior of some, disagree with their approach to Islam, but it is so important to stick together and remember that Allah (swt) does not want us to be divided or navigating this life all by ourselves. That’s probably why He insisted so much on taking care of our parents, finding righteous partners, educating kids and helping others: we go fast on our own, but we go further together.
Hold firmly to the rope of Allah all together and do not become divided. Remember the favor of Allah upon you, when you were enemies and he brought your hearts together and you became brothers by his favor. [3:103]
