How I've been building self confidence
How to Forgive Yourself for Past Mistakes
Photo by Youssef Naddam via Unsplash
I’m sure a lot of you will relate to feeling guilty about something you did in the past or about something you know is forbidden but still do and feel ashamed about/profoundly regret doing.
Although you shouldn’t ignore that guilt as it is a true sign of your love for our Creator, you should not beat yourself up about it either to the point you despise yourself. This can lead to dramatic physical and mental health consequences, or worse, to give up on religion all because you assume you’re not worthy of it anymore.
Instead, let’s learn to transform this feeling into an added energy to learn more about Islam and get closer to Allah SWT, and remind yourself that your value as a human/muslim doesn’t solely rely on your bad deeds.
1. Remember you’re only human
Have you ever realized how often ‘forgiveness’ is mentioned in the Qur’an? That is because Allah (swt) created us weak and knows that as much as we love him and try to improve, we will never be perfect. Even the prophets (pbut) weren’t irreproachable, so how can we expect to be?
Indeed, this is for you a reward, and your effort has been appreciated.[76:22]
2. There’s always a lesson
The qadr of Allah swt is the greatest and if you did something in the past you can’t seem to forgive yourself for, remember it was written and meant to happen anyway. Therefore, instead of dwelling on it, try to figure what learnings you can take from the expérience and what allah swt
3. Be merciful to yourself
The Messenger of Allah (SAWS) said: “The merciful will be shown mercy by the Most Merciful. Be merciful to those on the earth and the One in the heavens will have mercy upon you.” (Al-Tirmidhi)
That does not exclude yourself: if you are compassionate with others, you surely should be with yourself too..
“We have certainly created man in the best of stature.”
[94:4]
“O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.” [39:53]
You might think “I’m too ashamed to stand in front of Allah swt”, but not praying and asking for forgiveness will only make the guilt and the sin worse. Salat is the only thing that’ll bring peace to your heart.
Allah is with you & will never deprive you of [the reward of] your deeds.
[47:35]
